News: Racquetball Gold League: Week 1

Date Published	Author
10/7/2025 12:00:00 AM	Ron Marsh

My Dearest Racquetballers, 

I am thrilled to pressing these keys into the plastic frame in which they are encased to write you all. For this is the best time of the year, when the temperatures drop and the racquetball court gets booked non-stop. I want to start off with saying thank you so kindly for signing up early. Your timeliness makes this the easiest league to facilitate and for that we are eternally grateful. 

What do we have in store for this season? Kirk returns with a league full of players willing to learn all the tricks he has honed over the years. Courtney is back and determined to have a good time, and put the golden crown back on her head after all is said and done. Wes has bluntly said, "I want third place." Battles will be fought, friendships will deepen and muscles will strengthen through it all. Alright, enough with the romantic flavoring - let's get to the write-up: 

Fred v. Danny

 "No kicking, no biting, no cussing!" remarked Fred Georges as he and Planning and Zoning extraordinaire Danny Meuninck entered into the racquetball court. The two veterans of the sport bashed the ball around to warm up before getting underway. Fred has been playing solidly in the tournaments we held over the summer, and continues to teach us all the tricks he has developed in his several... and I mean several decades of games in the white cube. Danny has flirted with the crown for the last several seasons, and he is playing like this may be his year! Danny caught Fred off-guard in the first game, quickly gaining a lead. His serves were accurate and he was able to tuck the ball down for a nap, like the experienced father he is, directly in the corner where Fred couldn't handle it. When Fred did manage to return on a serve, Danny would capitalize by sending the little piggy to the market, also known as the forward corner pinch. Fred wasn't giggling however after taking a loss of 15-3 in the first game. Fred returned the court eager to work Danny into a sweat, and by golly GEORGE was he successful. Fred's textbook line drives down the wall were more daunting than Meryl Streep running The Gauntlet in the 1994 action thriller The River Wild (totally underrated on Rotten Tomatoes with a 63% -- this truly is a masterpiece and Kevin Bacon is phenomenal). Fred was cruising into points, and keeping Danny on his tippy-toes. The battle went back and forth, with Danny managing to wrestle the lead out in the end and won in extra points, 16-14. Unbelievable start to your season Mr. Fred! 

Benny v Courtney

We welcome Deputy Director of Parks and Recreation, Mr. Supreme, the Man & The Machine Benny Flores onto the floor. He joined a jovial Courtney as she planted her boys on a chair next to each other. After closer examination, I believe they were friction-fitted into the seat, as their hips next to each other made it so they were stuck in place as they watched their mother lay waste to a formidable opponent. Courntey did her thing, keeping a consistent rate of play and neatly stacked her points to two victories. However, Benny's extreme power and precision forced Courtney to make plays she is not accustomed to making in our league. He had two incredible backhanders all the way from the glass that travelled quicker than Kevin Spacey in KPAX. The ball was seen floating in front of Benny, then in a blink of an eye seen rolling off the front wall. We are excited to see how his game develops throughout the season. Courtney won by 10 and 11 points in the first and second game. 

Steve v Clay

After a steamy season of driving their big motorized boats around the rugged Kenai coastline, Steve Fink and Clay Lambert throw off their captains hats and committed to something that really matters: racquet sports. Steve has been a constant and formidable opponent in my entire tenure here at Sports and Recreation, usually reserving the 3rd or 4th position in the standings for himself when all is said and done. Clay has large dreams of winning it all for himself. They are so large in fact that he has to contain them all with a red, white and blue (Yeah America!) headband. Both of these competitors have a powerful swing with their racquet, which causes children in surrounding villages to run for the hills. Clay came into the court and played a stellar game against Steve, winning by a margin of 9 and 12 points in the first and second games respectively. Steve, who has been in the process of healing a torn calf, was not playing poorly by any stretch of the imagination. He made quick actions to return passing shots that would have flew by a less experienced competitor. Clay earned himself the largest point differential of the evening, which leaves him sitting pretty in first place. 

Wes v Ron

After a hot summer of staring at each other at the Yukon during Open Pool and Open Mic on Tuesday nights, Wes Shafer and Ron Marsh were rearing to see who would win the first match of their season. These two have had a casual competitive streak since they started competing against each other, like Vin Diesel and Paul Walker in the cult classic Fast and Furious - they could have never made enough of those movies, that I will tell you right now. The fast edits and the heightened contrasted film are burned into my memory. Wes and Ron struggle with starting out cold, so they started their game off by exchanging unforced errors. However, it soon became clear that Ron was in command of the lead. By the end of the first game, Ron had won with an 8-point lead. Wes came out of the court gassed, but determined to make Ron question his fate during the second game. If Wes were to win in the second game, they would have to go to a third tie breaking round to 11-points. Wes has an incredible ability to stay in the game even when he is exhausted, and he made a good shot at making it to a third round. Ron snapped out his funk and got back into the serving box to gain the lead. He won the night by winning the second game 15-10. 

Russ v Brian 

To cap off the first night of the Gold League, we had league newcomer Brian Wright against the man who keeps hustling all the other players at our Time-Trial Tournaments, Recreation Manager Russ White. Brian has been coming into the gym on his lunch breaks to practice what he has absorbed through studious racquetball YouTube sessions. With all of his efforts, he was excited to be matched up against one of the most challenging competitors in the league for his first game. It was apparent from the onset that Russ was in for a difficult game, and would have to dream up new strategy to conquer the newcomer. Clay, Steve and Ron sat behind the glass totally gripped - like Diesel and Mouse watching a young Neo get taken down by Morpheus. Brian stepped out of the court after he lost in the first game and looked me dead in the eyes, "I just learned Taekwondo". Get back in the court you scallywag! He did just that, and managed to stay in the lead up to 5-points, when a frustrated Russ started to make destructive kill shots that rolled off the front of the wall. Russ used this momentum to take it all the way to the win in his first game of the season, setting himself up for a great season. Brian is not to be taken lightly folks! Hopefully these bouts in the court end up in Brian's next book. We will do our best. 

Standings below. Thank you to all of our competitors for staying on top of the schedule and re-scheduling their games. As a reminder, only those who play their game during the scheduled time will be included in the write up. 

See ya this Friday!